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Yesterday felt different. It was my coaching supervision group in Guildford. One member wasn’t with us due to illness, and although we knew they had made the right decision for them, it felt a little different for us. Somehow it was an opportunity to re-form, to be different, maybe something about entering autumn. Our children had gone back to school (or college or uni), and maybe so had we.

I felt different inside myself. I told my story about the man I had met on the train last week and the difference it had made to him and his daughter taking her to the psychiatrist, what had happened, and what the outcomes were, from the first appointment

Having a plan
Recognition there is a problem
Not the only one
Knowing its achievable

Somehow this felt very real for all of us, and some of the difference we could help clients make with their own coaching sessions. One person commented on my man on the train’s emotional intelligence to see it in this way and summarise in this way.

But the thing with different from me, with my ability to see people differently. Somehow I was seeing my fellow group members as whole people, as equal people, with a breadth and depth and richness that had always been there, but somehow I was allowing, or I was seeing, in a new way to me.

It was less frightening, or less endangering, to allow them space, and to allow them their contribution than it had been before. I no longer needed to be top dog, taking my space, worried I would have my space. It was like these people were interesting, and there was room for us all.

Mad as this sounds, and I am not going to try to explain or understand it right now, I really do think this is my part of my journey to understanding what belonging means and feels like for me. Thank you everyone.

Gill How

Helping leaders grow, step up and deliver outstanding results

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